College Dating: Does Being ‘Facebook Official’ Matter?

By Briana Luca, Student at Iona College

Dating in college is a very odd thing.

It’s not the typical situation young adults are used to. We’re growing up and (hopefully) aren't playing the same mind games that we did in high school.

Also, in college, you are constantly with the person you are dating. Think about it: You go to class together; you live a hop, a skip and a jump away from each other; you go out on the weekends; and you’ll probably eat most of your meals together.

But there's an even bigger issue plaguing college couples nationwide … Does it matter if you're "Facebook official?"

In high school, it didn’t matter if you were dating anyone in real life because if it wasn’t on Facebook, no one considered it real. Nowadays, as we get older and are in college, does making your relationship public on social media matter?

In my opinion, it doesn’t matter.

There isn’t a need to make your relationship "Facebook official" anymore, especially on campus. I know many couples who disregard that "Facebook official” rule. Their relationships are still the same as the people who decide to make it public knowledge, maybe even a little stronger because you don’t have people documenting your every move.

It shouldn’t make a difference whether it’s online or not — if you know that you’re dating and your circle of friends know, why should it matter if the entire Facebook community knows?

Gabby Popoli, a junior at Iona College, had something different to say about "Facebook official-ness."

“If someone isn’t willingly to put it on Facebook, then they are trying to hide something or are embarrassed. But I think, overall, you can be dating and not put it on Facebook.”

That can be true in some instances. It might seem that if your boyfriend doesn’t want to make it public knowledge that you two are together, he may be hiding something. In other cases, you should understand that he might not be comfortable with social media and making that known to the world and that it has nothing to do with you.

Alana Keeley, a junior at Iona College agreed, saying, “Facebook is supposed to be yourself reflecting on social media and if that person means that much to you, why wouldn’t you want the world to know you are in a relationship?”

This is an epic battle of what is considered right and wrong. On one hand, why should it matter if your relationship is made public? But also … we have grown up with social media and live on the Internet, so if you aren’t comfortable with making a relationship "Facebook official," what does that mean?

This debate will be an ongoing matter, but in the end, you have to do what feels right for you. If you and your significant other are both equally comfortable with being "Facebook official," then go ahead and tell the world. If not, than that is a conversation you should both have.

All that should matter is that you are in a happy, healthy relationship. Just be happy!

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles /

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