Live Your Life: Staying Independent Within Your Relationship

By Rachael Smith, Student at Radford University

You know them … I know you do … those girls who don’t know or don’t remember their lives aside from the one they have created with their boyfriends.

I understand how it feels to fall in love when everything is brand new, but this does not mean you need to lose yourself.

I know a girl like this who goes to school with me. She’s an awesome girl with a spunky personality and we have a good time hanging out until she starts talking about her boyfriend in that annoying baby voice some girls do when they are playing with a newborn. This is not acceptable. This girl can’t even sleep in her own bed alone without him. I definitely don’t understand this because I love my space! She hasn’t even graduated college and she wants him to buy diamond rings for her. The poor girl doesn’t even know what she’s missing out there in the world.

While most of us can hold a boyfriend but also make time for our gal pals, some girls have to “check in” with their significant other to make sure they are behaving or have to call to see what they want and if what they want is a sandwich, she will go make it and make it just the way he likes it.

What happens when this couple breaks up? What happens when all of your friends have gone on to explore and be adventurous in their youth without you? These kinds of relationships can become detrimental to your friendships, family, schoolwork and personal life. It’s cool to be in love and hang out together and has a great time, but don’t lose yourself. Be the girl who maintains her independence and lives her life. And really live it when you’re young like we are!

Our 30’s are a time to settle down and make lunches or whatever your boyfriend wants. But our 20’s, those are for running around trying new things and knowing what it’s like to be single at least once. It’s incredibly liberating to live for your passions, your dreams and yourself than someone else’s. 

Image: nuttakit /

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