Well, it doesn’t have to be, especially when you have friends that will refuse to let you mope around feeling depressed. When my friend Jenna broke up with her boyfriend of five years, she called me on the phone, around midnight, and hysterical. Luckily, I was up trying to finish a research paper.
After deciphering what she was crying about, (stupid argument, boyfriend storms off, calls her back saying that they should take a break from each other and see other people), I tried to calm her down with the cliché phrases I’m sure all of us has either heard or spoken before: “don’t worry, you don’t need him”, “there are other men out there who are way better for you than that loser”. I didn’t work. I knew it wouldn’t work. But I was sure she would be feeling better soon, because plans for a party in her honor would begin the next day as soon as I called Aimee.
Why a party? Let me explain. During junior year in college, several friends and I were at a New Year’s part at my college’s football house. There Aimee proposed that we ditch making the same old New Year’s resolutions which we NEVER stick to and make one collective resolution: When one of us breaks up with a boyfriend, we celebrate – a sort of “Welcome Back to Singledom” party. I’m assuming Aimee’s idea stemmed from the fun we all had at the bar the night after she broke up with her boyfriend of two years. We dragged her to a nearby bar, bought her drinks, and presented her with Victoria’s Secret gift cards. The gift cards were to cheer her up because she was pretty messed up about the breakup. You had to see her. Actually, it’s good that you didn’t.
Back to Jenna’s party. After informing all the girls about Jenna (although she had already done that herself), we decided to have her party two weeks later (it was around finals week) at a local Long Island restaurant, Cabos, and treated her to dinner and drinks. And since she had been in a stable relationship longer than any of us have, we decided to make the night a little more interesting with the presents. To go along with the Victoria’s Secret gift cards, we also gave her some “special” gifts we ordered from Too Timid. The next night we hit the NYC clubs and had good laughs while we let the fellas TRY to woo us off of our feet. While the party, gifts, and night out with the girls may not have completely removed her sadness, I’m sure it made it easier to deal with the break up as well as realize that she has the opportunity to do things (whatever they may be) now that she’s single. In essence that is the purpose of our little “Break Up” parties. To celebrate the rebirth of a friend who is now entering the world as a single woman and that could be a positive thing. Why spend your days, months and years depressed and constantly thinking about a relationship that probably wasn’t destined to last?
On a not-so-completely other note: All this reminiscing about my friends’ Break Up parties has me planning mine. Ibiza!! First class all the way!!! My girls better start saving their paychecks now.