So, that relationship I ended via my cell phone last week? Well, as I’m sure most dumpers experience, I have since developed a slight case of “Oh-my-god-did-I-just-end-the-best-relationship-I’ve-ever-had?” syndrome. Since that awful Tuesday evening, I’ve been dying to talk to my ex and work things out. However, after several attempts to rekindle our romance through Microeconomic study sessions failed, I have decided that more drastic measures may be needed to win back my little (er, 6’5”) sweetpea’s heart.

Basically, I’m left with two options. I could grovel at his feet, write him 3 page apologetic love letters, stop by his house (because I am still like, best friends with all of his roommates) and engage in other psycho ex-girlfriend behaviors just short of stalking him.

Or, I could ignore him. Delete his number from my cell. Quit my manipulative attempt to weasel my way into his Friday night plans. Or maybe even block him on Facebook.

It’s practically a fact: All men want what they can’t have, whether that’s the hot cashier girl in the grocery store or his ex-girlfriend who has like, totally moved on with her fabulous life after only two weeks. So the logic here is that I make myself completely unavailable to him, he will be the one showing up on my doorstep with a bouquet of roses, and a nice big bottle of Carlo Rossi, if he knows me at all.

This seems like a win-win situation. Even if the boy doesn’t come back, I’m at least on my way to getting over him and finding a new hot guy to sleep in my bed. And if he does come back? Then I’ve got myself some roses, Carlo Rossi and a boyfriend who genuinely wants me in his life.