Grammy “Fashion”!

When Miley Cyrus is one of the most sophisticated dressers on the red carpet, you know you’ve stumbled upon a, how shall we say it… unique situation.

The Grammy red carpet is truly unique, because it combines the highest with the lowest, the A-listers who will head to the Oscars in a few weeks with the reality stars who will probably head precisely nowhere once their 15 minutes are over.

Case in point: the ever-gorgeous Beyonce graced the red carpet in a tasteful champagne-hued Stephane Rolland design, with sweet cap-sleeves balancing out a plunging neckline. Sharing the red carpet: one very tan, very Lyrca-encased Snooki.

Altogether, the attendees at the Grammy Award Show tend to be a motley crew, and that doesn’t usually bode well for the red-carpet fashion. In a night with many, many fashion faux pas, the stylish and the sophisticated truly stood out. Some highlights:

Jennifer Hudson’s adorable mini-dress with a peplum waist by Victoria Beckham was short and flirty, but the new mom kept the look classy in black.

– Star of the night Taylor Swift dressed the part in a slinky navy gown by Kaufmanfranco, embellished with her signature sparkles.

– She sang about feeling out of place at posh LA clubs in her hit “Party in the U.S.A.”, but with the Herve Leger mini dress she rocked last night, Miley Cyrus could fit right in. The long sleeves and subtle colors balance out the tight, risqué fit. Party in the U.S.A., indeed.

– Leave it to Heidi Klum to rock an embellished Emilio Pucci tunic-style dress in a post-baby body. Not that you could tell one bit…

– Rising Glee star Lea Michele showing off her teeny-tiny waist in a short navy frock by Romona Keveza with a shreaded chiffon skirt. Cute, flirty, and perfect for the adorable star.

Keri Hilson showed off her impossibly slim figure in a pale pink mermaid gown with just the right amount of Grammy bling along the waistline

Needless to say, such chic fashion choices were the exception and not the rule of the night. Some serious “lows”:

– I couldn’t tell what was worse: Nadeea’s train wreck of an outfit, or the fact that I (and a lot of other people) had no idea who she was. If she was trying to get noticed, I suppose Snooki-poof hair, a top held together by string, silver E.T.-eye makeup, and essentially no bottoms is a way to do it…

Ke$ha’s dress wasn’t the worst of the night (see: Nadeea), but this rising star’s make-up makes her looks like she’s come back from a long night of partying…  is this what it looks like to wake up feeling like P. Diddy?

– As for Katy Perry‘s get-up: it may have been a Zac Posen design, but this dress didn’t look suited for the runway or the red carpet. Come on, Katy— just because you’re engaged to a fashion mess doesn’t mean you have to go there too…

Ciara had us disappointed as well. First an explosively furry sweater at the pre-Grammy gala, then a see-though black Givenchy dress that was an overwrought mess, from embellished top to see-through bottom. That’s “1, 2 Step” in the wrong direction…

– Oh, Britney Spears. Every time you step in front of the camera we hold our breath: will this be the beginning of your comeback or another headline-inspiring paparazzi field day? Alas, the former Pop Queen’s lacey black Dolce & Gabbana number lands decidedly in the latter category, along with the trucker hats, obscene graphic tees and panty-less ensembles from the lost Britney years. Note to self, Brit: only Gaga can rock pantlessness.

Which leaves the eternal question: what about Lady Gaga? She’s gone so far that there is little she can do to truly shock us— she has conditioned her fans and the America public to expect the unexpected, fashion-wise, and to roll with the punches. Neon yellow hair, a solar-system hoop skirt, a 3-D lightening bolt headpiece, a leotard with a crotch so thin you could practically pee without removing it… was anyone shocked?

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