Clothing. Toys. Personal space. You name it, and pretty much it’s been fought over by brothers and sisters for the past gazillion years. But in an intriguing twist, a new study out of the University of Missouri suggests that siblings who had conflict and resolved it on their own WITHOUT PARENTAL INTERVENTION had better familial relationships and tended to do better when it came to conflict resolution across their personal and professional lives.

According to the study, violating your sib’s personal space or borrowing their stuff without asking was the quickest way to ensure she or he hated you forever, while whining and crying over who’s turn it was (i.e. fairness tactics among siblings) proved to be not that big of a deal.

Biggest surprise? Parents should intervene when it comes to trust issues and privacy, but stay out of it when you’re in the middle of a screaming match and threatening to tell the entire school your sister waxes her upper lip.